When it comes to being mean, the characters from “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” are worse than Hitler and Stalin combined. Well, not really, but you get the idea. Just when you think one of them has a redeeming quality, they go and sleep with their friend’s mom or hire somebody to stab the woman they’re stalking. Luckily for FX, these horribly mean moments are what make the show so great. With that in mind, we’ve picked some of the meanest moments from the first five seasons. Enjoy them with someone you love…and then pay a Carney to stab that person.
We apologize to any international readers who cannot view the Hulu videos. But hey, there are lots of pretty pictures as well.
#1
Mac Bangs The Waitress
“Mac’s Banging the Waitress” (Season 4, Episode 4) When Mac thinks Charlie has destroyed one of his stunt videos, he wants revenge. So as payback, he decides to sleep with the waitress that Charlie is constantly stalking. Take it from Mac, if you’re going to sleep with your best friend’s dream girl, at least go for the gold. Don’t settle for some “hand stuff.”
#2
Retard Rap
“Sweet Dee’s Dating a Retarded Person” (Season 3, Episode 9) Is Dee’s new boyfriend retarded, or is he just a really talented white rapper? Granted, that’s a tough call for anyone to make. But throw in the rest of “The Gang,” and you know it’s going to get offensive.
#3
Crack Head and Retard
“Dennis and Dee Go on Welfare” (Season 2, Episode 3)
What’s meaner than calling out a retarded guy who’s not really retarded? If you answered “impersonating a retarded person so you can get on welfare,” then you nailed it. Throw in a fake crack head, and you’ve got one of the meaner schemes in the history of TV.
#4
Dennis Bangs the Waitress
“Charlie Has Cancer” (Season 1, Episode 4) When Dennis thinks Charlie has cancer, he wants to help his sick friend get the girl of his dreams (The Waitress). But instead he just ends up banging said girl. It would be easy to feel bad for Charlie, but considering that he was only pretending to have cancer to help his chances with the waitress, he probably got what he deserved.
#5
Dennis Leaves Dee Outside the Club
“Frank Sets Sweet Dee On Fire” (Season 3, Episode 
While waiting to get into a club, Dee gets wasted. Rather than looking out for his sister, Dennis decides to leave her passed out on a pile of trash. In all fairness, there were hot chicks and ecstasy involved.
#6
The Gang Goes Jihad
“The Gang Goes Jihad” (Season 2 Episode 2)
“The Gang” finds itself in a land dispute with an Israeli neighbor. As such, they decide the best course of action is to make a fake Muslim extremists video and send it to him. It’s not often that someone manages to piss off Jews and Muslims at the same time. Kudos to you, “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.”
#7
Charlie Smashes Dee’s Face With a Volleyball
- “America’s Next Top Paddy’s Billboard Model Contest” (Season 4, Episode 3) Rather than hit a construction worker in the face with a volleyball, Charlie chickens out and nails Dee in the face instead. That’s pretty mean. However, Dee’s impersonation of Puerto Rican’s was pretty mean too, so I guess everybody wins.
#8
Mac Bangs Dennis’ Mom
“Mac Bangs Dennis’ Mom” (Season 2, Episode 4) This episode proves that lovable Charlie is actually an evil little man. In this episode, he convinces Mac to sleep with Dennis’ mom. Convincing your friend that it’s okay to sleep with your other friend’s mom is pretty mean. Actually, it might be the meanest thing ever, unless the mom were already dead, which would be worse.
#9
Seducing a Priest
The Gang Exploits a Miracle” (Season 2, Episode 7)
It’s mean enough to exploit someone who you know is in love with you. But when that person is a Catholic priest, it’s a whole different level of wrong. This clip is the first step in Cricket’s transformation from revered community leader to psychotic homeless man.
#10
Dumping a Guy Because He Was in a Wheelchair
“The Gang Wrestles for the Troops” (Season 5, Episode 7) When Dee finds out her online boyfriend is in a wheelchair, she decides she’s too good to date him. Oh, and did we mention the guy is a vet? Good Christ, the last guy she dated called her a retard in front of a large crowd. She’s not exactly in a place to be judging people.
#11
Having Dee Stabbed
“The D.E.N.N.I.S. System” (Season 5, Episode 10) In order to impress the waitress, Charlie hires a carnival worker to stab her. Sounds like the perfect plan, no? But the Carney gets confused and stabs Dee by mistake. Luckily, all he has on him is a key.
#12
Posting Dee’s Video Diary Online
“Mac and Charlie Die” (Season 4, Episode 5)
Charlie decides it would be a good idea to post Dee’s video diary on YouTube. It isn’t long until people start recognizing her around town as “Pathetic Girl.” Poor Dee; if she weren’t such a mean, rotten person we might actually feel bad for her.
#13
Setting Dennis Up For Child Molester Shenanigans
“Dennis Looks Like a Registered Sex Offender” (Season 3, Episode 11) Dee tricks a group of angry fathers into thinking Dennis is a child molester. This might seem pretty awful, considering it’s her brother. But to be fair, it wasn’t that long ago that he left her passed out in a pile of garbage. Besides, Dennis’ mustache definitely adds to the molester look.
#14
Smear Campaign
“The Gang Runs for Office” (Season 2, Episode When Frank wants to hurt Dennis’s chances in the city council race, he comes up with a slogan: Dennis Reynolds, Baby Rapist. How many times is Dennis going to be called a child molester before we all start feeling awkward about it?
#15
Salting the Snail
“The Gang Gives Frank an Intervention” (Season 5, Episode 4) Throwing salt on another human being is pretty messed up. Unfortunately, it’s the only way Dennis and Dee can get their awful cousin, “Gail the Snail,” to go away. Considering that Dennis and Dee actually feel bad about this, you know it must be pretty damn mean.